I feel bad writing...kinda of, two depressing posts one after another. But don't you worry your pretty like mind (if you know what I just quoted, ten points for you Glen Coco! You go Glen Coco) a funny/more humoris one is coming your way shortly! I just haven't finished writing it yet, and if you liked my "first date" post, you're going to love the next one! But unfortunately, this one isn't as funny as my pervious ones.
So let's set the mood
So it's 2AM and it WAS raining outside. I slipped out of bed, gracefully tripping over miscellaneous items on the floor& opened the window so I could let nature talk to me for few minutes. Literally, just a few minutes; I guess nature had somebody better to speak to tonight, It was nice well it lasted.
Anyways.... To my mind!
I have really bad anxiety, if you don't believe in anxiety than will say I have breathing issues, and become really overwhelmed very easy outside of my comfort zone. This blog should clearly be called "lost in a city full of issues" because clearly I have a lot! I'm kidding... Ha. Ha. Okayy anyway...
I am not religious, I do however have an amazing personal relationship with Jesus Christ. What's the difference? Ha, I'll have to save that for another post. But there's a scripture I've had tacked up on my bulletin bored since my freshman year of high school, that I still read outlloud every time my eyes see it.
Philippians 4:6
"Don't be anxious about anything. Instead, pray for everything. Tell god what you need and thank him for all he's done."
I'm sure you can understand why I like that verse so much, but also understand that what God is asking for, isn't the easiest thing. God says, "DONT be anxious" not "hey, des.. Maybe you could not be anxious, I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life or anything, because I know you're an independent black women but.. You know maybe you could just chill a little." He didn't say that... It was a command. To command an anxious person to not be anxious, is like putting a beer infront of an alcoholic, leaving the room and asking him not to drink it... The odds are not in our favor, So how do you deal with this!? Faith. "That seems to be the answer to everything for you God people," not everything, but that is the foundation of my relationship with Christ.
I deal with being anxious by trusting in the person that loves me most, and sometimes it's super hard... Like, really really really hard! But I know God loves me! He has plans and purposes way bigger than I could ever imagine! Yes, sometimes I don't understand and get frustrated and want to cry and even purposely try to defy God, but honestly.. I always end up in the same place.. In his will. The funny thing is, it isn't so bad.
But let's not forget the rest of the verse!
"Tell God what you need and thank him for all he's done"
Isn't that so cool! God wants to hear from you, what you need. (or think you need) He wants to talk to you and actually hear what you have to say. And he wants you to want to thank him... Not just to get what you want or because you think he needs to hear it, but because you are truely thankful.
And sometimes I am very ungrateful, because I don't take my mind off the negative and focus on the positive. That's going to change.
That's all for now dreamers
Xoxo Des.
Send me an email! Destinyholloway55@gmail.com
No comments:
Post a Comment